Warning Signs of Child Sexual Abuse and Ways to Seek Help

When a child suddenly becomes quiet, is afraid to approach someone familiar, wakes up crying at night, or feels uncomfortable going to places they once enjoyed, we often dismiss it as “a normal change with age”. But not every change should be brushed aside as normal. Sometimes a child’s behaviour speaks of something they are unable to put into words.

These non-verbal cues are often the primary distress signals a child can send when facing trauma. No single symptom should automatically be interpreted as evidence of sexual abuse, because the same behaviour may have other causes. However, sudden excessive fear or withdrawal, avoiding a particular person or place, sleep problems or nightmares, a sudden decline in academic performance, unusually advanced sexual knowledge, unexplained anger, depression or self-harming behaviour should be taken seriously. If a child experiences physical pain, injuries or discomfort involving the genital area, medical advice should be sought promptly. Sometimes the most important warning sign is the child’s own words.

The scale of the problem is too serious to ignore. According to UNICEF’s first global estimate published in 2024, one in eight women and adolescent girls alive today experienced rape or sexual assault before the age of 18. If non-contact forms of abuse, such as online or verbal sexual harassment, are included, the number is even higher. Boys are also at risk.

It is a reality that becomes especially critical when considering where that harm originates. One of the biggest misconceptions about child sexual abuse is that danger comes only from strangers. The reality is far more difficult. According to UNICEF, a large proportion of sexual violence against children is perpetrated by someone the child already knows or trusts. Therefore, teaching children simply not to talk to strangers is not enough. They must also be given the language to understand their bodies, personal boundaries and behaviour that makes them uncomfortable.

And the first layer of child protection begins at home. From an early age, children should be taught in simple language that their bodies belong to them; private parts are private; and if any touch, conversation, photograph, request for a photograph or demand to keep a secret makes them uncomfortable, they have the right to say “no” and move away. It is equally important to move away from the culture of “you must obey whatever an adult says” and give children the right to establish safe boundaries. The same rules must apply even when the person involved is a familiar relative, teacher or another authority figure.

There is, however, an important distinction to remember: children must not be made solely responsible for their own safety. Teaching them to say “no”, move away and tell a trusted adult is useful, but the primary responsibility for preventing abuse lies with adults. Families, schools, madrasas, coaching centres, sports institutions and organisations working with children should have clear child safeguarding policies. These should establish what behaviour is acceptable, how one-to-one interactions with children should be conducted, where complaints should be reported, and how staff should be screened and trained.
In this age of technology, the digital world cannot be treated separately from child protection. Today, a significant part of children’s education, friendships and entertainment takes place online. Therefore, age-appropriate discussions are needed about personal photographs, video calls, private chats, pressure from online acquaintances and blackmail. If children are threatened with having their phones taken away, they may hide information about a danger they are facing. Instead, they should be assured that if they encounter a problem, their safety and access to help will come before punishment.

Even if someone faces abuse and discloses it, they need a respectful, compassionate and child-centred initial response, says World Health Organisation. The first steps are to listen carefully, ensure the child’s immediate safety and connect them with professional support based on their physical and psychological needs. Medical care is not only necessary for visible injuries. Where appropriate, it may also include prevention of infections, mental health support and long-term recovery services.

It is also important to know where help is available in Bangladesh. Children themselves, parents or anyone concerned about a child can contact the Child Helpline 1098. The nationwide toll-free service, operated with support from UNICEF and the Department of Social Services, provides counselling and, where necessary, can refer children to protection, legal assistance, shelter, healthcare and other services.

Usually, a child remains silent for a long time because of fear, threats, dependence on a relationship, guilt or an inability to understand what is happening to them. However, our goal should be to create an environment where children are not taught to “stay quiet”. They should learn that it is safe to speak when something makes them uncomfortable, that seeking help is nothing to be ashamed of, and that abuse is never the child’s fault. When a child believes that their voice will be heard, the first door to protection opens.

Ultimately, keeping children safe is not complicated in principle. We must remain vigilant, ask questions, build relationships based on trust and seek help quickly when necessary. It is far more important to prioritise a child’s safety than to dismiss their silence as normal.
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The writer is the health affairs secretary of Jatiyatabadi Chhatra Dal’s Bogura district unit and vice-president of the central committee of JCD’s Dhaka metropolitan (West) unit