Sunday, 25 September, 2022
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With the Wind: Dating – Now and Then

  • Tulip Chowdhury
  • 3rd September, 2022 05:59:15 PM
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Pardon me if I am wrong, but the word ‘dating’ sets the blood astir with promises of romance. That endless thirst in our beings for love keeps us going above and beyond to find a soulmate. The truth hits home when someone is looking for love or ready for some juicy stories on the subject.

Stepping back to pre-Internet days, one wonders if life was less stressful and more chance-happening for romance. There were days when people looked forward to meeting potential soul mates face to face, and they looked forward to looking into their eyes and seeing life unfolding as “Us.” If we are in pace with the modern world, in matters of love, our minds move to the Internet. Somewhere behind the screens, when we join the millions of people searching for potential soul partners. After a long search on Google, we find a good dating site with pictures of men and women smiling and happy, all seemingly ready for a rosy future. The membership slots open with multiple questions about your hopes for a partner. One can choose how the partnerships could be. Are you looking for a long time or a temporary relationship? When the forms are filled up with the desired information on the membership form, one could keep fingers crossed and wait for replies/ likes. Once the likes pour in, some are more convincing, while others don’t appeal to the soul. Dating life at that spot seems to be in the soup. At this point, life feels acts like an old dog; it works according to designated plans. A person sending like emojis may not be the kind we are looking for, or the smiling face appealing to me may not respond at all. The seekers of romance remember that life as energy didn’t make any promises of delivering romance easy on the golden plate.

While we think the world is at our fingertips with the Internet, finding love in life gets into tougher riddles every day. One would expect to have things easier with us clicking away on the keyboards. When all the browsing doesn’t work out, we venture into the people gathering places- hoping to catch the eyes of someone- who could be the answer to our prayers for a soul mate. Some people wonder if the perplexity of love in “online life” or in-person one will get impossible to solve. They are ready to give up and say, “I am too tired to look anymore and better off as a single.”

For the love of life - people will not give up trying to find romance. When the Internet hits the walls, we often look for someone among crowds - big and small. With family breakups going up, people falling out of love, and wedlocks - people find romance in life for the second and the third time creep in. Coming with the changes, the concept of finding the “one and only” in life has found new colors. One would think that not having to depend on only one wanted love is not easy to solve when dating comes to finding a potential partner willing to care for and love the children caught in the family splits.

On the other side of the spectrum, there might be someone looking into the eyes of the loved one and seeing there is truth in “I love you.” Once again, what to do when the lady or the gentleman you are attracted to wears contact lenses? The dark eyes might be blue or vice versa. It is like a puzzle one tries to fit into one’s life – like two personalities merging into a single, beautiful collage. However, there is still the hope to find perfect, complete happiness with the love of one’s life. There are dramas and movies on dating, beginning on the playgrounds where single parents meet. It can start like this, “It’s hard to make time as a single dad/mom and balance work.” The chances of Cupid finding its mark- remain a hit-and-miss situation.

In the reality check of dating and finding a soul mate- no one person can be perfect or fill all the expected roles of a lover/ life partner. Fall is coming, so winter shall soon follow- and not spring is the typical time to look for love and Valentine’s Day. If one is like the woodchuck that does the romance and family in hibernation- this fall or winter might be the time for love to arrive in life. Good things call for patience. If the passing season is not the one- spring shall be here in no time. Who knows, the one meant to be joining this good life- might be just on the dot. To quote Rabindranath Tagore here, “shokol premee ochenago / taito hridoy dule”, to say that  love dwells in the unknown world, so the heart finds joy in finding it.

Tulip Chowdhury writes from Massachusetts, USA.

Source: Sun Editorial