Dealing With A Narcissist | 2018-06-14 |


Dealing With A Narcissist

Magazine Desk     14 June, 2018 12:00 AM printer

Dealing With A Narcissist

There are so many people out there around us who are narcissistic in nature. If there is someone in your life with a narcissistic personality, knowing how to deal with her will make your relationship a whole lot easier. Forget about the normal rules of love or friendship when dealing with a narcissist. Whether it's a spouse, friend, relative or colleague, the narcissist has the ability to drain your energy, make you doubt your own integrity and zap your self-confidence if you don't know how to deal with her. Here are some ways:


Recognize a narcissistic personality

A narcissist has a heightened sense of his own importance, always puts himself before others, loves being the center of attention and needs constant admiration and praise. Not all narcissists are created equal, however: some are obnoxious, rude and difficult, while others are inoffensive, likeable and even charming -- on the surface at least. The main quality a narcissist lacks is empathy. A narcissist will struggle to love unconditionally, have limited insight into his actions and feel no regret.

Focus on the positive sides

If you're in a close relationship with a narcissist, focus on her positive qualities. Getting intimately involved with a narcissist is likely to result in hurt and loneliness, because he/she simply will not be capable of genuine intimacy. But if you are already in love with or married to such a person, remind yourself of the reasons you fell for her in the first place. Accept that her narcissistic personality is part of the package and concentrate on her more endearing attributes.


Don’t take anything personally

When it comes down to it, narcissists can normally be projecting their own insecurities faults or mistakes onto others. They can blame you for something that you have not done or undermined your self-esteem. If you can take a step back and look at things from a different perspective, it can start to become a little easier for you to deal with. Try not to argue with a narcissist as unfortunately, they may not listen to what you have to say. Instead, tell them that you disagree but do not carry on the conversation. Know your self-worth and have a strong sense of self, this can make it much easier to reject any unfair blame or criticism that they could put on you.


Set healthy boundaries

It is important to set some boundaries with this particular person if the relationship has now become unhealthy due to their narcissistic personality. Narcissists may not be able to listen or acknowledge your feelings and worries you may be experiencing. If you can set some boundaries in a calm, respectful way, they may be able to listen to you and start to try harder in your relationship. It is possible they may get angry and defensive. In this case, maybe walk away for a little bit and revisit the conversation later on. If you can talk to this person and set boundaries, this can make the friendship/relationship easier for you.


Communicate successfully

Successful communication with such personality type does require some amount of ego massaging. Making demands or displaying anger seldom works. For example, instead of telling your narcissistic partner he needs to go with you to a friend's party because you don't want to go alone, say something like "My friend really misses you and would love to see you." If you're already in a close relationship with a narcissist, this technique is the best way to get what you want from him.